To err is human, to forgive divine. Neither is government policy.

The last time politics and religion were mixed, people were burned at the stake.

Love him like a king.  Train him like a dog. I'm hung like Einstein and as smart as a horse!

A cubicle is just a padded cell without a door.

I'm not opinionated, I'm just always right. PMS: Punish men severely

I'm so hot I contribute to Global Warming!

For every action there is an equal and opposite criticism. What if the Hokey Pokey really is what it's all about?

Don't bother me. I'm living happily ever after.

I'm out of estrogen and I have a gun Forgive and Forget but keep a list of the names

God created man first.  You need a rough draft before a masterpiece.

Does a Beer Run count as exercise? Squirrels:  Nature's little speed bumps

Suburbia: where they tear out the trees & then name streets after them.

If at first you don't succeed, blame someone else If you can read this, I lost my trailer!

Why do they call it

My 401K is now a 101K Keep the dream alive: Hit the snooze button.

Home is where you hang your @