Save the trees ... Wipe your butt with an owl. Your ridiculous little opinion has been noted.

If Progress means to move forward, what does Congress mean?

I'd give my right arm to be ambidextrous I haven't lost my mind it's backed up on disk somewhere

I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts -- Do You Want Fries With That?

YOU!  Out of the gene pool GONE CRAZY BE BACK SHORTLY Fight Crime: Shoot Back

If you can read this, please flip me back over...

Stop Animal Experiments   Use Lawyers Don't make me come down there - God

If I throw a stick, will you leave? YOU!  Off my planet! Better living through denial

The only person who got everything done by Friday was Robinson Crusoe

A balanced diet is a cookie in each hand I can't remember if I'm the good twin or the evil one

24 hours in a day - 24 beers in a case.  Coincidence?

You say I'm a bitch like it's a bad thing. A system that robs Peter to pay Paul will always have Paul's support

Behind every great man is a woman rolling her eyes.

Vegetarian: Indian word for lousy hunter. Watch out for the idiot behind me.